2013 Resolutions: Walk Instead of Run

First of all, Mom's surgery was successful and she's beginning to recover.  I'm so grateful she's okay and appreciative of the prayers for her.  I had a hard time fighting back the "what if's" that come along with a parent getting sick or going for a major surgery.  It was such a relief to hear from the doctor last Wednesday that the surgery went perfect.  What a way to begin 2013.

Like most people around the country, I've been reflecting on last year and looking ahead at 2013.  I made a list of goals for 2012, and while I didn't meet all of them, I shot toward most of them, and it was exciting and satisfying to look back on what I set out to accomplish throughout the year.  I am a list maker.  I love lists.  I like to add stuff to my lists so that I can check the stuff off.

One of the things I did not do in 2012 is run a marathon.  At least not physically.  On this side of 2012, I feel like I ran a marathon.  A lot happened in our family in 2012, and right now I'm feeling particularly worn out by all of the activity, good and bad.

In 2013, I think my number one resolution is to walk instead of run.  I am tired of running all of the time.  There has to be a way to slow down.  I am so good at busy, so good at "entering a busy season," that stopping or just braking for a minute seems impossible.  Of course, I am already defeating myself in this area, since next Monday I will start classes toward my master's.  hahahahaha

I'd like to make a list of things not to accomplish in 2013.  Like, don't accomplish anything.  Be content.  Take care of yourself.  Breathe once in a while.  BUT, since that's anti-'merican, here's my list of things to do in 2013:

• Maintain sanity
• Pray and give thanks daily for this life
• Remember the promises given by God in the Bible and remind my family about them regularly
• Continue preparing healthy meals for my family
• Complete the assigned coursework for my MFA, turn in work I can be proud of, and write toward a book-length manuscript of essays
• Go out with my husband once every two weeks
• Play with my kids; do something special with Elvis and Lydia alone once a quarter
• Expand the garden
• Go on vacation, anywhere
• Continue to chisel away at debt
• Blog every other week

BW and I will celebrate ten years of marriage this year.  We are aiming to be out of debt by early 2014 so that we can quickly get back into debt by going to Italy.  ;)  We're both great spenders and lousy savers.  This is an area we'll need to really hone in on if we want to make it happen.  

I left off physical exercise although I do hope to still do some of that some of the time.  Typically exercise and writing take turns in my life - if I'm exercising I'm not writing and if I'm writing I'm not exercising.  

I have a feeling that the MFA will knock me down and bully me with its reading list and writing requirements.  I tend to be prolific but on my own time, not on a schedule, so we'll see how that goes.  No time.  No time.  No time.  Where's my live-in maid?  Where's my butler? 

I should add "keep up with the house" to this list, but come on. Something's gotta give here.  Gratefully, my husband recognizes my general suckage at household chores and granted permission to hire someone to do the deep cleaning for me once a month or so.  This is a huge relief because when Saturday comes, there are few things I feel worse about than cleaning all day instead of spending time with the kids after I've spent all week working.

I should also add "keep up with the laundry" to the list.  That's one thing you just can't neglect, especially with five people living in the house.  Brandon is a huge help in this area, too, unlike some husbands, who delegate all household chores to their spouses because that's "women's work."  Brandon is a champion chore-sharer.

As much as I hate baskets of laundry sitting around the house, laundry has about eight too many steps.  First you have to collect it from the multiple hampers and carry it down to the basement. Then you have to sort it.  Then you have to wash it.  Then you have to wash it again because it sat too long in the washer after you forgot to switch loads.  Then you have to dry it.  Then you have to turn the dryer on fluff cycle because everything sat too long and got all wrinkly.  Then you have to fold it.  Then you have to sort it into appropriate stacks for each family member. Then you have to move it to the appropriate bedroom and nag the children about putting their clothes away.  Then you have to throw your arms up into the air and huff and puff about how they haven't put their clothes away or they've jammed them in and messed them all up.  Then you have to pull everything out of the drawers and refold it and put it all back in the appropriate drawers.  And then, after all of that hard work, they pull them out, wear them, and put them back into the hamper.

Know what I could handle?  Wash. Dry. Fold.  That's it.  Someone else can deal with the rest.

What are you resolving to do, or not to do, in 2013?

Building Community

This past weekend, I spent some time in Indiana with about a dozen other writers who mostly met about three months ago at the Festival of Faith and Writing.  We decided to come together because we're all at similar places in our careers, like-minded in ideology and vision for our poetry, and we're all outrageously funny.  At least we find ourselves to be.

I think it is unusual to find and make fast friends with people, but especially other writers. There is a competitive air that surrounds most writer gatherings (except for the River Teeth Nonfiction Conference and the Ashland University MFA Program, but then again, I'm a smidge biased...), a chance to name drop, a chance to prove your superiority or make yourself feel better by pointing out the faults in well-known poets' work, a chance to spread your feathers and strut about with one's accolades ablaze.  This is of course a generalization; not all writers are this way, and not all retreats and conferences take this tone, but we all know those writers who seize any opportunity to establish themselves, sometimes at the cost of other poets.

This retreat was not that way, though we leaned that direction a time or two, mostly in good fun.  What we did was laugh a lot, share our passion for language and poetry and our belief that words have the idealistic power to change people.  We talked about ways we might collectively use our words to make an impact within groups of people who are not as inclined to buy a collection of poems or pick up a literary journal.  We shared meals and drinks together.  We got to know one another and traded stories from each other's lives, and we left eager to meet again, hopefully soon.  And then we began emailing and Facebooking each other to continue the conversation.

That is what community is about--taking the time to feed each other with laughter and truth and common concern for each other's well being.  Community, even across state lines, is sustained by the simple, "Hey, I was just thinking about you and..."  I am ever so grateful for having found this particular set of friends to mutually encourage and challenge as we work toward our personal and collective goals.

In ten days, I get to participate in yet another writing community, this one in my own backyard.  Sixty students and about 20 visiting writers and faculty will descend upon Ashland, Ohio for the annual two-week summer residency (writers' boot camp), and I can hardly contain my excitement to see students and faculty that have become more than colleagues--many are friends.  Even though it is a stressful two weeks involving a lot of administrating, it is also one of the highlights of my year. 

AND, I get to read from my new book for the first time.  Insert several smiley face emoticons here.

End of the Residency

Another MFA residency is behind us, another group of students have begun their writing journey at Ashland, and another class has graduated.  What a great two weeks!  Everyone is off to their hometowns, and today, I enjoyed a nap, a movie with my kids, a walk, and grilling some burgers and vegetables.  It was quiet, relaxed, and without agenda.  Ahhhh.  Now, the husband and I are in our respective positions - on the couch watching ESPN and behind the computer typing away. I love normalcy.

Tomorrow, we're celebrating Elvis's fourth birthday with family.  Four years old already.  Yeesh.  It feels like a lot longer than that since we were in the hospital with him at Children's.  What a blessing he is - even when he's whiny and cranky ;)

Henry will be three months already this week, and as anyone who has seen him the last two weeks knows, he just keeps getting chunkier.  He is such a cooperative baby - he cries when he's hungry, stinky, or tired, and that's about it.  I can't imagine how the residency would have gone if he had been a much more difficult baby.  This is the first year that all of the kids and Brandon have stayed in town the full two weeks, which was nice.  I'm glad that we were able to make it work without too many hiccups. 

And as always, the residency was inspiring.  I always leave the two weeks with new ideas and projects in mind.  Now to find the time to explore them.

It's no alarm clock Sunday tomorrow!  Yay! 

The MFA Administrator Responds to Email at the Residency

The MFA Administrator Responds to Email at the Residency

- A Found Poem



The washer
and dryer require
payment,
but they aren’t
coin operated.

You’ll need
to swipe a gift card
you can buy
from the bookstore.

If it is broken,
we will need
to submit
a work ticket
to fix it.